Saturday, September 13, 2008

Alive...in my dreams and memories


There's one thing I had always hated about being by your side during the time you were on the death bead. Somehow the good and happy moments that we had together are being overshadowed by the times you were sick and suffering. Rather than remembering you as the one who taught me alphabets and numbers, who bought me an ice cream of my choice on the first of every month, who was my teacher at home, who always told me about the power of positive thinking, who gave me some valuable lessons on life, who paid my school and college fees, and prominently as the one who is most responsible for the better part of me; I remember you as the one who I went along with for those chemotherapy sessions, the one who had asked me in the middle of the night to apply some oil on the neck that was bleeding after an operation, the one who let me press his legs for the first time ever when he was sick, the one whose body and eyes were turning yellow because of the jaundice attack, the one whose forehead I kissed only after his demise, the only one who had tolerated so much pain without heaving a sigh. This could be the only reason why I avoid thinking about you…pushing myself to think something else that did not give me pain.

But dreams are things that I have no control of. And in my dreams I see my grandfather…. alive but always sick with cancer.

Wednesday, September 10, 2008

My crazy obsession for voice chat :P




22nd year of my life and I've never used headphones until the 6th of September 2008. I'm loving it.

Hardest part was of course fixing them to my computer. If you think I am dumb, for now I will agree :). Thanks to harika- my best friend…she taught me the ABCD of fixing headphones to PC.

Instructions for people who still do not know how to use the headphones ;)

1. Look for three colored ports at the back of your processor. For people who do not know what a processor is…am glad you are dumber than I am :P.
2. Now look for the symbol of headphones on one of the two wires that come from your headphones and fix it into the green colored port of your processor (precisely the middle one). And the other into the pink colored port.

It took me a while to decipher the colors coz all the three looked *white* to me. My computer was losing hues L…. Or maybe I am losing sight?

Anyways if you think you are done…sorry you are mistaken!

Call someone and test. If you are as fortunate as I am…you would hear the voice of your friend but your voice wouldn't reach him :P.

Hence check the audio configuration of on your pc and enable the microphone. This wasn't easy, it took me 4-5 hours to figure out the problem with the settings. My pc was giving some weird errors- you cant place the volume icon on the task bar coz the volume control program has not been installed. That left me wondering how I could adjust the media player volume if the volume control wasn't installed.

If you were smart, it wouldn't take so long though.

Let me know if I was helpful :P.

Saturday, September 6, 2008

Drifting apart but staying together



Office hours were such a stress
When he returned home he just slept
Files, papers and timeless meetings
His peace of mind was by far amiss

And here she waited for him to join
The dining table that longed for their union
To talk, laugh and together dream
Was all and everything she ever asked him




He skipped his meals and often got sick
But his struggle for life forever sustained
So much into work that he never bothered
A family of four he barely looked after
Was she being taken for granted?
Or was the love lost in the ashes?Many questions were bothering herLeaving her depressed and insecure 

The love was there concealed in his heart
How deeply he cared he failed to show her
Despite the abeyance he was always there
Pity she could not see the hidden gestures



With time she knew he was doing it all
For them alone and their children's future
One good opportunity was all he looked for
A promising career that could end the disaster

Tuesday, September 2, 2008

:(

My other blog The rubix cube went private in april.
The reason being my brother who has been constantly prying into everything I do with the Internet :( and myself forgetting to clear the history each time I leave the system.
A strange intuition that my brother might have hit upon my blog url by then, forced me in making it private.

Today I was wondering… how come the idea of changing the URL never occurred to me? :(